The New Showme December, 1930The New Missouri Showme December, 1930 20081930/12image/jpegUniversity of Missouri Special Collections, Archives and Rare Book DivisionThese pages may be freely searched and displayed. Permission must be received for subsequent distribution in print or electronically. Please contact email@example.com for more information.Missouri Showme Magazine CollectionUniversity of Missouri Digital Library Production ServicesColumbia, Missouri108show193012The New Showme December, 1930; by Students of the University of MissouriColumbia, MO 1930
All blank pages have been eliminated.
Journalism Show Number $00.15
J.C. PENNEY Co.
THE MISSOURI SHOWME 3
Editor's note: The Showme allows the following
material to go to the printer only with some remorse.
It is of the type that constitutes more than ninety per
cent of contributed matter, but this, we believe, is un-
usually good. Only the best of the bad goes in!
Certainly, it is not because that it picks on the Del-
ta Gams that we print it. We'd wager the Providence
Road girls drew the publicity because their name fits
into the meter and because Monsieur X happens to be
dating at the present time at 904. He even makes the
brag that he could do as well by many houses.
Somewhere in Columbia
Sometime in November
Mr. Lynn Mahan,
Editor, Missouri Showme.
Attached hereto you will find the idle thoughts of
an embryo tabloid man during an almost sober vaca-
tion. I trust you will find time to cast your editorial
optics over them. I promise you quite sincerely that
publishing any of the material inclosed herein will kick
up quite a stew in certain quarters of the campus, and
will run up your circulation figures maybe as much as
a dozen copies. What more could any editor ask?
It grieves me very much, my dear Lynn, to be
forced to keep my identity a secret even from you.
Don't misunderstand me and think that I don't trust
editorial discretion. I have the greatest of confidence
in you, but circumstances force me to be doubly dis-
creet. Anyhow I never forgave the editor of the Old
Outlaw for giving me a by-line and running my stuff
under my name. Imagine my embarassment at see-
ing my name in print, for all who would to make
bright cracks about. In order to keep such a thing
from occurring again, I, perforce, must remain as
Songs of the Leathernecks
This is not a tale of the Kappa Sig and the girl the
boys call Mable,
Nor the Theta kite nor the Kappa key nor the Pi Phi
This is not a song of an SAE, caught, alas, with the
Nor the hectic tale of the Sigma Nu who lost a blonde
in the woods.
Nor is it a song of vacation time along fraternity row,
When the lights go out, the brothers up, and the gin
supply runs low.
These are the songs of the Delta Gam-much power
and glory to you;
These are the tales the girls won't tell-they're the
Singing the songs of the Delta Gam, happy and gay
A toast, a toast, the cry goes up; let's make it a week-
Oh it's week-end, a week-end-Allah surely will pity
The plight of the two from the leatherneck crew who
week-end in Kansas City.
Who knows the tales of the Terminal gang, the Tiger
and Tavern too?
The question is easy, the answer breezy-the leather-
Who are wordly wise and know their boys as modern
With a different pin for every dress?-The leather-
(Continued on page Twenty-three)
4 THE MISSOURI SHOWME
The New Missouri "Showme"
VOL. II. DECEMBER 9, 1930 NO. 4
Editor-in-Chief, LYNN C. MAHAN
Managing Editor, ELLIOTT E. REDIES
Maxine Bickley J. W. Brown, Jr.
Helen Leisner Collette Smith
Eugene Rich Elinor Pryor
Barney Meyers Dan Safier
Richard Montague Bud Newcomer
Frances Rush Maynard Hartley
Exchange Editor, Dick Slack
Henry Riedel David Russell
Marcella Shepard Ann Curtis
Frank Miller Dorthea Pickett
Clarence Coburn Pat McMullen
Humor Editor, Foust Roper
H. C. McDonnell Bill Mack
Roy Schumacher Harry Smythe
Art Editor, Harold ("Abie") Elfenbein
Lovan R. Hall Bill Dalton
Jack Baker Hazelle Sparks
Arthur Houston Paul Bumbarger
Earle O'Rourke John Bickley
Jack Hackathorn Harold Boyle
Business Manager, C. EVERETT HOWES
Jack Linck Mary Lundeen
Frank Tooley Jane Lindsay
Advertising Manager, E. Willis ("Bill") Brown
Jane Lindsay Edith Wells
Charline Holloway Louis Cook
Evelyn Russell Sydney Smith
Herbert Cummings Bill Clark
Circulation Manager, Frances ("Sis") Arnold
Gene Moore John Rush
Thornton Wood Dennis O'Connell
Lyle Weatherholt Emma De Hall
Gregory Hutchison Joyce Schenk
Poetry Editor, Dick Sharp
Bud Newcomer Katherine Bayne
J. D. White Andy Squires
cover by Harold ("Abie") Elfenbein and Lovan Hall
Copyright, 1930 by Missouri Chapter of Sigma Delta Chi. Exclusive reprint rights granted to College Humor Published by Sigma Delta Chi as
the official humor and literary publication of the University of Missouri.
Address all communications to the Showme, care Herald-Statesman, Columbia, Missouri.
With this issue the Missouri Showme inaugurates what it hopes may become a tradition, the Jour-
nalism Show Number of Missouri's comic.
Herewith is the first attempt. Perhaps future editors, working upon our precedent, can improve.
We hope so. At any rate, we believe the idea-that of tying up the leading student dramatic effort with
the leading student journalistic product of the campus-is good. We hope that the Missouri Showme in
presenting the program has attained a degree of excellence not too far below the level of the 1930 Journal-
ism Show, itself.
"Waiting Without . . .," Journalism Show Commission, receives our heartiest congratulations.
THE MISSOURI SHOWME 5
The Showme Show
To Our Critics
We had a chat-absolutely not
a conference-with Dean Bessie
Leach Priddy last Saturday. Just
as dean to man.
"The Showme?-just a bit
risque." She smiled.
We knew that. but really
thought, comparatively, Mis-
souri's comic sounded like a Sun-
Questioned further, Dean
Priddy believed that too much
drinking and necking was be-
smirching Showme's columns.
And we added another question
to the dog-eared notebook.
Should we hide the hidden
from the hiding? And other
questions penciled there, un-
Where is the line between
risque and the risky?
What actually do the stu-
dents want that deans won't
Or is that a noble way to
How many sales are re-
quired this month to give a
margin for the printers and
And despite our School of
Journalism training, the final
question looms up like a sheriff's
sale to the turned-out mortgagor.
With an average increase of
about seventy-five each month so
far, and a brighter future, reassur-
ing, Showme sales may lessen our
But Showme is new. It has no
favorable background, nor prece-
dent. (The Outlaw was only an-
tecedent.) It has no working
capital except an impecunious de-
termination to pay off a too high
purchase price and to leave the
campus the beginnings of a stable
And, believe us, there's a prob-
Salvation swings upon a sound
Solution swings on interest.
Now what is interest?
EMPHATICALLY, we'd like
to publish the finest comic in
America. And when, if ever, we
find that non-existent line of de-
markation between the cleanest
and the finest, by the shades of
Rabelias, Boccaccio and Balzas,
* * * *
It is always interesting to hear
criticism of the University's condi-
tion and practices by one who not
yet has become be-fouled and, con-
sequently, inured by them.
Transfers immediately find us
cribbing and "hocking." Surprised
and placed at disadvantage, they re-
mark about it. And we supposed
that we were just an era or so be-
hind others even in this highly de-
veloped despicable art.
A recent editorial implores and
deplores. We view with alarm.
Wasn't it ever thus?
Now if only sociologists would
decide between instincts and habits,
heredity and environment, we
might be able to trace the thing to
And correct it.
Dinner with a Chinese student
the other day. Not uncommon, but
this dinner was particularly illum-
inating. The result follows:
How does the foreign student,
of foreign tongue, and ear, and eye,
sit and talk with us about literature,
politics, the stock market, U. S.
geography, affairs of state, child-
labor and prohibition in as author-
itative manner as we laboriously
assume, while on affaires interna-
tionales, he makes us sound like
And now the University of Kan-
Five teachers colleges, four or
more military academies, a double-
dozen denominational and privately
endowed institutions, and junior
colleges in every other county seat.
An expansion policy for the Uni-
From where will the increase
come? Aggressive competition
with these step-sister schools?
China and the Argentine? Or a
more thorough high school recruit-
The latter? There are twice as
many now trying to work their way
through college as can find jobs.
But we're pro-administration.
There's a mellow method in the
State legislatures only read re-
lationships in figures. And we can
Where are the shows of yester-
year ?-Back in competition days.-
Back even before Dozier Stone
signed the famous anti-DeGraff-
and Meyer-Merchants' petition.
Back in the days when even a fren-
zied boycott wouldn't frenzy.
Two shows in seven weeks for
us. One was marvelous. The other
we went to see because of the lead-
ing lady. And wondered whether
or not she too had athlete's foot.
Columbia is not getting the
shows. A few years back the best
came here along with Kansas City
and St. Louis runs. "All Quiet on
the Western Front" was about a
year behind. The best we've al-
ready seen; the rest we don't care
The movies, the pool-rooms and
the stadium. Take your pick of
-L. C. M.
6 THE MISSOURI SHOWME
"I understand that Hiram sold his farm for a song."
"Yes, the notes were too high for him."
Fly Tox song Fly Away With Me
Lifebuoy song .. . .Body and Soul
Listerine song---.--------.Just a Little Closer
Lucky Strike song.-----.My Sweetie Went Away
B.V.D. Ditty.Don't Tell Her What Happened to Me
The knees I knew, the knees I know,
The knees I knew of yore,
Such ones I've seen, what fun they've been!-
But now they'll be no more.
Once every pair with modest air
Displayed itself to view;
Their shapely grace and not the face
Filled college men's Who's Who.
Beneath the dress-ah, such distress!-
Their charms are once more hidden,
And to the eyes the salt tears rise
And linger there unbidden.
Each recent gown drops stately down
And covers half the floor-
And all of these sweet wind-swept knees,
Ah, they shall knock no more!
-H. V. B.
Stadium Sam, better know as Clyde Columns, wants
to know where he can find the neck of the woods.
Annual Christmas Joke
"Is that a reindeer?"
"No, Honey, that's snow."
Professor-"Write a thousand word paper on Frank-
Student-"His bender in Philadelphia or the one in
"My entanglement with the opposition," said the
military man, describing a recent conquest, "resulted
in her complete demoralization."
Dashing through a shave and into your clothes and
down to a cab and over to her apartment and up to
her door to find out that your date is for tomorrow
night is just like rushing eagerly through one of these
long sentences to find out that there's no dirty re-
mark at the end of it.
"That locksmith is certainly a very nervous man."
"He's all keyed up."
Whitman's Famous Candies are Sold By
Peck Drug Co. Harris Cafe
Prather Drug Company
8 THE MISSOURE SHOWME
FROM SANTA CLAUS' M. U. LIST
Old Santa was wheezing and snorting as he
looked over his Christmas lists. "Dern me," he
said, "this Missouri campus is just chuck loaded
with people who want presents. Here's the list as
far as I went."
It is with pardonable pride that the Showme
presents this list of requests and hopes that Christ-
mas Day will find the stockings (and socks) well
filled. We feel the stockings will be.
Charley Hughes-A nice, big volume of "Love's
Ann Dudley Killiam-More cows to conquer.
Connie Read-A robot Secretary.
Al McCollum-A better Savitar than last year's.
The Showme-Something funny.
Clif Hull-Ten cans of "Sez me."
Guy Green-A parrot that knows a few new cuss
Lucy Wilson-The autobiography of Ruth Han-
Tippy Smith-More crutches and more, "You-
Bud Pollitt-Another Phi Mu dinner for self and
Hal Foster-A left handed "monkey wrench" for
use at dances.
Mary Jim Barnes-A few more heathens to edu-
cate. (in politics).
Carl Ulffers, Bill Clark and John Trimble-Slot
machines, decorations and 200 bucks.
Gyda Hallum-A good-sized scooter to replace
Don Cox-A shiny musical baton.
Bill Harrison-Some recognition at the Phi Delt
Marshall Craig-Another winning Tiger team.
Jap Smith-More political campaigns to manage.
Carl Goetz-Recipe for home brew.
Gladys Salter-Another good photographer and
a new coiffure.
Catherine Sharp-A new ensemble. (for pictures
Laurence Coffman-More appendix operations.
Roten Schweitzer-A male beauty contest that
will actually go through.
Bubbles Cotton-Another "cotton edition" of the
Dick Deimer-Free trips to Kansas City.
And as for those who didn't get their names on
the list we can only hope that Santa will find your
chimney before the stork does.
Journalism Show Program
10 THE MISSOURI SHOWME
Journalism Show Commission.
E. K. Johnston, director of the
Frank H. Gearhart (left) and
Maxine Bickley (right) Co-
authors of the play.
THE MISSOURI SHOWME 11
In The Order of Their Appearance
Dwight Johnson .--. --.----.--- -. ---.--- -------. Sobig, the caretaker
Vera Pulliam .-.- --. .-.--.----. ------------------- Lil, a chorus girl
Clarence Coburn . -- - -----------------. . ----------Ziki, a chorus man
Elliott Redies .--.--. --. Unky, the stage manager and director of the show
George Clay .-.-----.---.---------.------ ------- Tom, owner of the show
Clark Miller _ -----------------~~. .------------------- .Gobler, a stage carpenter
Dixie Brown -----~~.- . .---------. .----.-------- Mrs. A. Hardy Black-Smyth
Ruth McAllister ----. ---.--.---------.-.------- Sue, a ward of Mrs. Black-Smyth
Stanley Bonham .-.--. .----. ----.--. .-----.----- Ryding, a soda clerk
Roy Mason .--.-- --.---- -----------.---- Faker, the announcer
J. C. Goodwin
12 THE MISSOURI SHOWME
FIFTEENTH JOURNALISM SHOW
Presented by the University of Missouri Journalism St udents Association, Inc.
Officers of the Association The Journalism Show Commission
Marvin Goforth, Chairman
President - Ed McLaughlin Jane Lindsay Ralph Jennings
Vice-president - Jessie Cosgrove James McAtee Jessie Cosgrove
Secretary-Treasurer - Frances Corry Patricia Herbert Evan 'Moe' Rutherford
Costumes-Ethel Carnahan, Marion Gray Franklin, Harold Elfenbein, LaMonte Davis
Staging-Jules Fogel, Harold Kopel, Adrian Gum, Sherman Ware, Howard Lawler, James Jacobs, Lovan Hall,
Morris Richards, Bradford Bond, Harold Clark, Theodore Cooper, Lex May, J. W. Brown, Jr., Joe Pongonis,
Ed McGrath, Harold Fellman, Lewis Roop.
Supplement-Harold Fellman, Margaret Ann Weldon, Fred Murphy, Ed Smith, Cecil Bragg, Helen Shepherd,
Tickets-Frances Corry, Thelma Suggett, Betty Huey, Brooks Ann Cole, Zona Moore, Fred Webber, Carita
Miller, Sarah McClendon, Katherine Curtis, Art Whitsett, David Joslyn
Publicity-Lucille Wallace, Eugene Moore, Jean Hardesty, Jack Linck, Edward McGrath, Bob Horiguchi, Lynn
Specialty-Esther Witt, Janice Simon, Frances Curtis, Richard Sharp
Make-up-Ruth Coursault, Lucille Olney, Frank Gearhart, Ted Wallower, Erma McAllister, Winifred Tiffin,
Grace Townsend, Lorraine Harrelson.
Ushers-Joe Marston, Frederick Brokaw, H. R. Kernberger, Joseph Soraghan, Cecil Bragg, Maynard Hartley.
Maxine Allen Bickley and Frank H. Gearhart
Dances and Chorus Costumes
Blanche Jameson McHarg
Stage Design and Managing
Comedy Songs Direction
Maxine Allen Bickley
Entire Production Under Direction of
E. K. Johnston
Place-A Small Town in Missouri
Act 1-The Gem Theater, just before rehearsal
(Intermission, five minutes)
Act 2-One Hour Before the Opening Performance, three days later.
(Intermission, ten minutes)
Act 3-The Revusical continued
(Above) Martha Harlan, re-
(Right) Dennis Southard and
Joyce Burns, specialty
(Left) Fred Akers and J. C.
Goodwin, specialty dancers.
(Below) Virginia Stillman, So-
loist in Revusical.
14 THE MISSOURI SHOWME
Miss Ruth McAllister, who plays the part
of Sue, ward of Mrs. A. Hardy
Stanley Bonham, Ryding, a
Comedy team- at the right: E
left: Maynard Hartley, Dwig
THE MISSOURI SHOWME 15
George Clay, Baritone, the Masculine Sing-
ing Lead, as Tom, Owner of
Dixie Brown, Mrs. A. Hardy
ott Redies, comedy lead; to his
t Johnson, and Clark Miller.
16 THE MISSOURI SHOWME
The Play and the Revusical
Easin' My Feelin' . . .-----------. .-----------. .Mrs. Black-Smyth, with Johnnie McGuire at the piano
For No Good Reason At All .Ziki, Ryding, and Mrs. Black-Smyth, with Johnnie McGuire at the piano
For No Good Reason At All --.-----.--------.------------------------------Unky and Ensemble
Who Am I Thinking Of .-.-.----Sue and Tom (just one hour before the opening performance).
1. Overture .-.------.----------. ---- ------------------Johnnie McGuire's Tiger Club Band
2. How'd You Like To Have A Willy Nilly Girl.---- eorge Clay and Dixie Brown with boys and girls
Neat Ankles . -----.--- .------------------------------------------------- George Clay, with girls
3. Dance .----.-.-.~---.--- . ------ ------ ---------------------------- Thelma Martin and Joyce Burns
4. Four Little Puppets .-----.era Pulliam, with Fred Akers, John Thomy, J. C. Goodwin, and Clarence
5. With You .-.-. ----.------- ------ ----------.Virginia Stillman, with George Clay and boys
6. The Poor Little Match Girl-
A Match Girl-Betty Davidson
A Millionaire-Frank Eschen
The Chauffeur--Frank Gearhart
7. Romona From Arizona .----.--.------.---. --- ----- ---- -------- ---------- Ruth Fite, with boys
8. Who Am I Thinking Of . --------.-. ---------------George Clay, with Helen Duncan and Betty Stump
9. Moanin' Dragon Blues .------------ ------ . Peggy Sparks, Martha Harlan, and Mark Harrington
10. Waiting Without-
The King-Dwight Johnson
The Queen-Edith Wells
A Slave-John Thomy
H.R. Mueller Florist
THE MISSOURI SHOWME 17
COCA-COLA BOTTLING Company
11. Dance .-- --. ---. --.--.------.------------------------------.Thelma Martin
12. College Life Is A Dream Life .--------.---.---Stanley Bonham and George Clay with Male Chorus
On the Campus .-----.-----.---------. Mark Harrington, Stanley Bonham ,and George Clay
-13. Night Football-
A Boy-Clarence Coburn
A Girl-Beatrice Sprinkel
A Voice-Roy Mason
14. When Cupid Plays the Two of Hearts .--------.----George Clay with Vera Pulliam and girls
Dance . .-----------.-------------------- ------ .Dennis Southard
15. My Kingdom For a Plot-
The Sheriff Patricia Herbert
16. Out Looking For Love .---.-- ---- --------------- dance by Fred Akers and J. C. Goodwin
17. Your Spook and My Spook -----.--.--.----Elliott Redies, with boys and girls and Frank Gearhart as a Seer
18. My Mother Was a Lady (Believe it or not, Mr. Ripley)
A Waiter-Stanley Bonham
Little Mary-John Thomy
A Maiden-Ruth Fite
Ladies of the Evening-Betty Davidson, Jean Lane, Edith Wells, Beatrice Sprinkel
Gentlemen of Leisure--Dennis Southard, Frank Gearhart and Joyce Burns
18 THE MISSOURI SHOWME
Typewriter Service Co.
(Continued from page seventeen)
19. Aboriginal Diplomacy-
A Boy-Clarence Coburn
A Girl-Jean Lane
An Indian-Dwight Johnson
20. College Moon .George Clay, Ruth McAllister, and Stanley Bonham with boys and girls
21. Four Horsemen of the Poker Chips .-.-.-.- Frank Eschen, Roy Mason, John Thomy and Clark Miller
22. Little Nell, Pride of the Prairie-
Jack Dalton, of the U. S. Marines-Frank Gearhart
Oscar Van Dillingsworth-Roy Mason
Santa Claus-Roy Mason
Little Nell-Betty Davidson
Her Mother-Edith Wells
23. Dance-Joyce Burns
24. In the Land of Naki Saki .-.--.---.-- .------.Ruth McAllister, with girls, and Jean Lane
25. Sweetheart of.Old Mizzou .---------. .-.- George Clay, Mark Harrington, and Stanley Bonham
26. A Nutting We Will Go-
Queen Elizabeth-Frank Gearhart
Henry VIII-Frank Eschen
Napoleon Bonapart-John Thomy
Julius Caesar-Roy Mason
Campus King, a horse-J. C. Goodwin and Fred Akers
SCHOOL OF COMMERCE
THE MISSOURI SHOWME 19
NANCY MAE SHOP
27. My Girl . -.-.-.-.------ .- . .------ -- .---.George Clay and Dorothy Viner, with girls,
and dance by Thelma Martin and Joyce Burns.
28. Killin' Time .--.---------------------- -------.---Tom, Sue, Ryding, Lil, Unky and Mrs. Black-Smyth
An Intermission of ten minutes follows.
2. Gypsy Jean .--. .------------------ Stanley Bonham, and girls, with Beatrice Sprinkel,
Virginia Stillman, Dorothy Viner, Jean Lane, and Ruth Fite as Manikins
I Wonder If You'll Remember Me .-.--.--. ----- -----.---Martha Harlan, as Gypsy Jean
3. Taken For a Ride-
4. Dance .--------------Thelma Martin, Joyce.Burns, Dennis Southard, Fred Akers. J. C. Goodwin
5. Waiting Without .---------------- ---------.--Dixie Brown, with Johnnie McGuire at the piano
6. Lavender Lou .--------. ----.----. . ~ -.---------------. ----- .---- Stanley Bonham, with girls
7. Mystic Moon .-.---.----. ----------. ---------- -------------Ruth McAllister with boy and girls
8. In the Gool Old Days .---- ---. .-.-------Betty Davidson, Edith Wells, and Jean Lane
9. In A Swing-------------. ---.-----. --- -------Vera Pulliam, George Clay, Ruth McAllister, Elliot Re-
dies, D. C. Johnson, Clark Miller, Clarence Coburn, Dixie Brown, and Stanley Bonham, with girls
10. Finale-Entire Company of seventy-five people.
Following the final performance, Thursday night, Dec. 11, the Journalism Show Commission will be hosts
at a night club dance for all who have helped in the produ ction of the 1930 Journalism Show, the entire cast and
the staff of the Missouri Showme at the ball room of th e Tiger hotel.
20 THE MISSOURI SHOWME
Authors of the
Song and Skits
Easin' My Feelin' . Dixie Brown
For No Good Reason at All . Music by Everett Howes
Lyrics by Maxine Allen Bickley
Who Am I Thinking Of . Frank Condon
Overture to Act 2 Orchestration by Johnnie McGuire
How'd You Like to Have a Willy Nilly Girl .
.From The Hundred Dollar Bill, 1911
Neat Ankles .--.-.From Bambino, 1924
Four Little Puppets . From the Green Jug, 1921
With You . From Glory Hallelujah, 1928
The Poor Little Match Girl . Patricia Herbert
Ramona from Arizona . From The Love Jewel, 1923
Moanin' Dragon Blues . From The Love Jewel, 1923
Waiting Without .-. Patricia Herbert
College Life Is a Dream Life .
. From The Hundred Dollar Bill, 1911
On the Campus .. Maxine Allen Bickley
Night Football . Carmen 'Tommy' Crocker
When Cupid Plays the Two of Hearts .--
.-.-. From The Girl and the Bomb, 1914
My Kingdom for a Plot . Patricia Herbert
Out Looking For Love .~. Fred Akers
Your Spook and My Spook . .
.-. .---. .From The Green Jug, 1921
My Mother Was a Lady . Maxine Allen Bickley
Aboriginal Diplomacy . Carmen 'Tommy' Crocker
College Moon . -------. Frank Condon
Four Horsemen of the Poker Chips .-----------.--.
.-.-.-. . -From Criscrosses, 1925
Little Nell, Pride of the Prairie .-
.----------. Maxine Allen Bickley
In the Land of Naki Saki . From Bagdaddies, 1926
Sweetheart of Old Mizzou .-. Music by Roy Keith,
Lyrics by Patricia Herbert
A Nutting We Will Go . Music by Everett Howes,
Lyrics by Maxine Allen Bickley
My Girl . From Glory Hallelujah, 1929
Killin' Time .---. W arren Peterson
Overture to Act 3 . Orchestration by Johnnie McGuire
Gypsy Jean . From The Ninth Deacon, 1922
I Wonder If You'll Remember Me .
. From Quack-Quack-Quack, 1927
Taken For a Ride . Harold Kopel
Waiting Without .--.-. Music by Everett Howes,
Lyrics by Dixie Brown
Lavender Lou . From Land of the Toreador, 1912
Mystic Moon .--. From Bagdaddies, 1926
In the Good Old Days .-- .
.-.---. . . From Quack-Quack-Quack, 1927
In A Swing .-.- . From The Love Jewel, 1923
Finale . Orchestration by Johnnie McGuire
* * * *
JOHNNIE McGUIRES TIGER CLUB BAND
Direction, Johnnie McGuire
1st violin-Paul Stahlman.
2nd violin-Evan "Moe" Rutherford.
3rd violin-Roy Albertson.
The Girls' Ensemble
Mary Catherine Abney Charline Holloway
Jane Altman Selma Levin
Marjorie Books Elizabeth Neff
Ida Lee Cannon Virginia Pentecost
Miriam Carter Frances Rush
Helen Duncan Helen Selvedge
Harriet Eldred Betty Stump
The Men's Ensemble
E. W. ("Bill") Brown Stanley Nelson
Bill Fisher Pal Powell
Tom Francis John Roberts
Bob Lowry arry Smyth
Vernie Myers Bill Schweitzer
Tom McElwrath Lyle Weatherholt
WHY, DID YOU SAY?
Headline in Missourian, "Holiday Extended at K.
U. Students Good Behavior at Kansas-Missouri Game
is Rewarded." K. U. got an extra half-day. On that
basis M. U. students should get off for a week. Was
there a K. U. dean in Columbia?
We understand that the drug store was raided last
night when the police found Lydia E. Pinkham and
Dr. Pepper in the back room with a case of Listerine.
THE MISSOURI SHOWME 21
Thelma Martin, specialty dancer
(Right) Ruth Lindsay Hughes,
(Left) Vera Pulliam, Lil, a
22 THE MISSOURI SHOWME
Ellen Jane Froman
(above right), who first
sang "Mystic Moon," is
now a featured singer on
three radio programs. She
sings with the Crosley
Saturday Knights and is
a Victor recording artist.
Four years ago she was
in the School of Journal-
ism. She was a member
of Gamma Alpha Chi.
Frank Houston (at the
left), less than ten years
ago was working on "The
Ninth Deacon" and "The
Green Jug"; today he is
author of a successful
novel, "Hooper Dooper."
He was a member of the
old Showme staff and a
Sigma Delta Chi.
Jane and '"Ginger" Rogers,
who with their brother, Arch
made up the Rogers side of "The
Ninth Deacon" and "The Green
Jug", were on the Keith-Orpheum
circuit after they left school. They
sang in Barney Gallant's night
club and in Don Dickerman's
clubs, The Daffydil and the Coun-
ty Fair, until "Ginger" middle-
aisled it this past summer. They
will make at least one more joint-
appearance this coming spring at
the annual dinner of the White
Franceswayne Allen, who
wrote and acted in "Quack,
Quack, Quack," has been direct-
ing amateur theatricals from
coast to coast for the Universal
THE MISSOURI SHOWME 23
(Continued from page three)
It's "Policeman, policeman, officer take me home.
Though I'm true to the leathernecking crew I can't get
Allah have mercy on the man, who foolishly tries to
A gal from the house of Delta Gam-the leatherneck-
Each gal in the house of Delta Gam sings this little
"An anchor pin in a sea of gin is good enough for me.
Anchor pin, anchor pin, here's to the gals who wear it;
A bottle of gin makes the whole world kin, or mighty
gosh darned near it."
Now give us an ear you Theta girls, Kappa and Pi
Laugh up your sleeve at these sad tales and we'll tell
what we know of you.
Something big for all of us to do before Christ-
mas vacation-a great big Christmas party with a
greatbig tree and presents for everyone in school
-and they'll be dirty digs too. It's Thursday, the
18th, at Harris' and free dancing to boot. And
there's gonna be a big "bull" board with Santa
Claus letters from everybody (written by someone
Missouri Drug Company
24 THE MISSOURI SHOWME
Here is our Second
Edition of Real First
The Prize Baby will
receive a new pair
JACK VAN DORAN POLLITT
"His Innocence is Preserved"
Here's more of us. And cuter'n bugs' ears! If some of us don't win this con-
test, there's politics in the shadows. And politics (legal tender) really
shouldn't count at this tender age. Give us a hand in this contest.
Our mothers did. We're rating the page this month. Maybe
you'll be next. And if you're cuter, we'll support you. But
you couldn't be. Just observe closely our ears and eyes.
We are four. And what a vocal quartette we can
make. We are in miniature edition, dragged
out as dusty heirlooms and reproduced
to prove that photos never die.
Austerity and dignity of
campus ways are here
revealed in less
AI Edgar Asbury
"-To ask for more than manly
"The Same 'Tell-Me-Why' Appeal"
Stanley West Cox
"The charm and sweetness of his smile
is still his proud possession"
THE MISSOURI SHOWME 25
"I'll brighten your days and nights with love," he
vowed. "I'll give you a happy home and a family. I'll
give you the most gorgeous of gowns and wraps and
Sighing, she shook her head.
He rose slowly to his feet and dusted his trousers
about the knees.
"But can't we be friends?" she asked, tritely.
The rejected suitor turned to go.
"Certainly. But we won't have to see each other.
I'm going to Africa and marry some fat cannibal wom-
"John!" she exclaimed, the eternal feminine jeal-
ousy flaring up, "You mean you're going to offer a
beastly black creature all the things you've just offer-
"No," he answered, taking comfort from the
thought, "What would they do with clothes?"
E. C. Clinkscales & Sons
TAVERN DRUG STORE
Black and Gold
26 THE MISSOURI SHOWME
MISSOURI UTILITIES CO.
Montgomery Ward & Co.
Think these are Funny
Dad: Son I never kissed a girl until I met your mother.
Will you be able to say the same to your son?"
Son: "No, dad, not with such a straight face.
A patent medicine manufacturing company received the
following letter from a satisfied customer.
"I am very pleased with your remedy. I had a wart on
my chest, and after using six bottles of your medicine, it moved
up to my neck, and I now use it for a collar-button."
Sigma Chi (On 'phone)-"How are you this evening?"
Pi Phi-"All right but lonely."
S. C.-"Good and lonely?"
Pi Phi-"No, just lonely."
S. C.-"I'll be right over."-Exchange
"How are all the little pigs down on the farm?"
"Fine. And how are all the pledges at your house?"
He: "Babe, you're a double-dating, gin-drinking, gold-
digging college widow."
She: "Please don't call me Babe. It sounds so unrefined."
"How is it that your parrot swears so shockingly?"
"By an oversight he was left one nite in a sorority house."
Soph: "Come on, take a bath and get cleaned up. I'll
get you a date."
Frosh (cautiously) : "Yeh, and suppose you don't get the
"Who ever named you Quits?"
"Well, when I was born, father came in the room and
said, 'lets call it quits, Ma.' "-Claw
First: Did you enjoy yourself when you were a Fresh-
man at college?
Second: Did I? Why, those were the happiest years of
Advertisement: Eskimo Spits Pups for ten dollars apiece.
When tempted by a sweetie, reach for a Lucky.-Phoenix
THE MISSOURI SHOWME 27
She must have been a mechanic's daughter, because she
had a good housing. -Claw
"Can you multiply?"
"Do I look like a rabbit ?"-Medley
Two sparrows met one day on a telegraph wire. One
was a nice, big, fat sparrow, and the other was a little thin
Little sparrow: "Say, how do you keep so fat?"
Fat one; "Well, see that little town over there? Thats
where I live. How come you look so thin?"
Little sparrow: "Well, I live in a big city. There are lots
of autos that go 'Putt, Putt' but you can't live on promises."
-Zip 'n Tang
The children of far away Andes
Crawl on their feet and their handies,
But when learning to creep
Up mountains so steep,
They use non-skid belly-bandies.-Lampoon
"Son, can you direct me to the band?
"Sure-for a quarter.
"Isn't that pretty high pay?
"Not for a band director."-Zip 'n Tang
"I'm all hot and bothered."
"Well, I'm hot-now if I could only be bothered."
He: "Do you pet?"
He: "Go ahead then. I'll be the goat.-Medley
Having taken a two-year course in French. I approach-
ed the waiter with boldness, and although they laughed when
I spoke to him in French, he returned with excellent Scotch.
"We are now passing the most famous brewery in Berlin,"
exclaimed the guide.
"We are not," replied the American tourist, as he hopped
off the bus.-Octopus
They sat alone in the moonlight,
And she soothed his troubled brow,
"Dearest, I know my life's been fast,
But I'm on my last lap now."-Wet Hen
Delt: "Say, if you give me another kiss I'll marry you."
Chi O.: 'You're practically married now."--Wet Hen
And one miniature golf course closed out of respect for
one of singer's midgets who drowned in the water hazard.
-Pi t Panther
Tiger Beauty Shop
Lucky Strike Cigarettes